Posted by: Jennifer | June 20, 2013

Am Writing

Three days ago I finished Words Unspoken, an outstanding book by Elizabeth Musser. In fact, it was so good that I can’t stop thinking about it…the way she wove her characters together, the way she kept the reader guessing, the way her words flowed, and the way she made me want to read all her books. In fact, yesterday I placed on hold every Elizabeth Musser book in my county’s library system.

In my mind, Ms. Musser now sits on a pedestal with three of my other favorite authors: Angela Hunt, Lisa Wingate, and John Grisham. Now I know you may be surprised by John Grisham since his is a completely different genre, but these writers all share one common thread – well researched, keep-me-reading, superbly written books. In fact, I don’t know how they do it. They have something that my love-to-write self just doesn’t quite possess. It’s the difference between a good pianist and a concert pianist, a good tennis player and a pro tennis player. (I use these analogies because I am a pianist and I love to play tennis. Yet, I know there are levels upon levels of expertise above my own abilities.)

But, I also love to write. In fact, my psyche requires me to write. Writing anchors me, fills me with purpose, makes me excited to wake up and start my summer days.

Unfortunately a sad thing happened the other day after I finished Words Unspoken. I concluded that since the books by my favorite authors are so many levels above my own attempts, I needed to quit writing my latest story. A story, by the way, that has been ruminating in my head for at least the last four years. (The words in my head, therefore, would ironically remain unspoken.) Nothing, my logic told me, is worse than a poorly written book, and there are already way too many of them out there. I figured there was no need for me to write one more.

So, for two days I didn’t write. The first day after allowing this destructive thought pattern to take hold, I wrote five words and shut the computer. The next day, I didn’t even try. This morning I woke up, missing my story so badly but yet convinced there was no point and “happened” upon I Thess 5:24. “Faithful is He that calleth you who also will do it.”

I couldn’t get past that verse. I thought of my piano playing. I know I am not a concert pianist but I sure love playing the piano. Whether playing preludes, playing the great hymns, or accompanying the choir, it all fills me with thanksgiving and joy. Yet, when a visiting pianist comes to our church and blesses my heart with concert-level music, I don’t quit playing the piano. So, why did I think I had to quit writing?

God has hardwired me to write. It doesn’t necessarily mean He is requiring me to be a “concert author,” He simply created me with a need to write. I am happiest when I am writing. So, today I will go back to my book, back to those five neglected words from two days ago, and back to solving my characters’ problems.

If I ever feel it is good enough, I will publish it. If not, I will save it for my daughters. But, regardless, today I can say:

#amwriting.

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